Animal Cracker Deathmatch
Dead People Of The Day
Things Dr's Never Tell You
The Moment After the Show
Happy 50th To The Hula Hoop
Sex And Beauty
Reverse Cowgirl Blog
Sunday, June 22, 2008
Not Always Right
Retail | Myrtle Beach, SC, USA
(A tourist walks up to my register with a handful of trinkets. I ring her up, she pays, I bag the items, and hand her the coin change. As she steps away, I see a dollar still on the counter.)
Me: “Ma’am, you forgot the rest of your change.”
Tourist: “Oh! I guess I did, unless you were paying me in pesos.”
Me: “Excuse me?”
Tourist: “Pesos. The money in Mexico.”
Me: “I know what a peso is, ma’am, but I’m not Mexican.”
Tourist: “Puerto Rican?”
Me: “Not even close.”
Tourist: “What are you, then?”
Me: “I’m Native American.”
Tourist: “So am I.” (She’s white as notebook paper.)
Me: “No, I mean the people here before white people.”
Tourist: “What do you mean?”
Me: “You don’t know about Natives? Indians?”
Tourist: “Oh, you mean the people John Wayne killed off.”
Me: “Just take your change.”
Enter my site for astrological
interpretations and dream interpretations,
spiritual advise, Mystic Gardens, and
mystical advise for your enchanted journey!
Saturday, June 21, 2008
ShadowLands Ghosts & Hauntings
Welcome to The Shadowlands Ghosts and Hauntings page, the Internet's original ghost website. We have assisted 1000's of people through this website alone. We have also educated the general public and ghost hunters from the points of view of researchers as well as that of someone who is experiencing things they do not understand.
Need Help? Want someone to talk to concerning a haunting? We are here to listen and help.
Dave was the center of a haunting in his own house. Having lived with spirits for over 36 years, he has first hand knowledge of living in a haunted home and all the problems that it can cause if you don't understand what is happening. We are all learning and growing here. There are no experts in this field of research. Dave has been researching ghosts for over 20 years. He has been the director of South Jersey Ghost Research for the past 12 years. He is the author of "Positive Energy for Haunted Homes", "Armor of God" and "Ghost Research 101".
Tina has assisted 1000's of people as the Director of the Las Vegas Society of Supernatural Investigations and here over the past 12 years. She has lived through hauntings and she understands how difficult it may be at times.
Not Always Right
Fast Food | Lowell, MA, USA
Me: “Welcome to ***, may I take your order?”
Drive-thru customer: “Yeah, I’ll take the double cheeseburger.”
Me: “Okay, would you like to make it a value meal?”
Drive-thru customer: *screaming* “DON’T INSULT MY INTELLIGENCE! IF I WANTED A VALUE MEAL, I WOULD HAVE SAID VALUE MEAL!”
Me: “Fine, that will be $1.87 at window two.”
(He drives up, I take his money and hand him the food.)
Drive-thru customer: “I’m gonna need ketchup for the fries.”
Me: “Sir, you only ordered the sandwich, not the value meal. I can ring up an order of fries now if you’d like.”
Drive-thru customer: “No, you screwed up my order! I’m NOT paying for extra fries!”
(Fed up, I throw some fries in a bag and hand them to him.)
Customer: “Wait, is it too late to substitute onion rings??”
Me: *slams window shut*
Life In A Micro World
Cities Of Color
Beginner's Guide to Sporn
The Art of Shopdropping
Largest Fish tank that holds 4, yup 4 Whale Sharks
High On Sex
A Fuck A Day
Friday, June 20, 2008
"I've done about everything in show business except to play on Broadway"
Tula Ellice Finklea
Birth: Mar. 8, 1921
Death: Jun. 17, 2008
She Dies of an heart Attack, and will be buried in CA.
Claim To Fame:
Cyd Charisse was born to be a dancer. She spent her early childhood taking ballet lessons and joined the Ballet Russe at 13. In 1939 she married Nico Charise, her ex-dance teacher. In 1943 she appeared in her first film, Something to Shout About (1943), billed as Lily Norwood. The same year she played a Russian dancer in Mission to Moscow (1943), directed by Michael Curtiz. In 1945 she was hired to dance with Fred Astaire in Ziegfeld Follies (1946), and that uncredited appearance got her a seven-year contract with MGM. She appeared in a number of musicals over the next few years, but it was Singin' in the Rain (1952) with Gene Kelly that made her a star. That was quickly followed by her great performance in The Band Wagon (1953). As the 1960s dawned, musicals faded from the screen, as did her career. She made appearances on television and performed in a nightclub revue with her second husband, singer Tony Martin.
Cyd was "the other woman" in Marilyn Monroe's last and unfinished film, Something's Got to Give (1962).
In 1952 she had a $5-million insurance policy accepted on her legs.
In Call Her Mom (1972) (TV), she was originally to have done the part played by Gloria DeHaven, but was replaced by Ann Miller before DeHaven finally took over the role.
When casting the film Damn Yankees! (1958), the studio was initially interested in pursuing Cyd as Lola and Cary Grant as Applegate. In the end, Gwen Verdon won the right to recreate her stage role with Ray Walston the devilish Applegate. Cyd was supposedly unavailable but later played the role on the legit stage.
Lost out on two of MGM's biggest movie musical roles. She fell and injured her knee during a dance leap on a film which forced her out of the role of Nadina Hale in Easter Parade (1948). Ann Miller replaced her. She also had to relinquish the lead femme role in An American in Paris (1951) due to pregnancy. Leslie Caron took over the part and became a star.
Was offered the lead role of Jo Stockton in Funny Face (1957) but declined. The role was eventually played by Audrey Hepburn.
She was awarded the American National Medal of the Arts in 2006 by the National Endowment of the Arts in Washington D.C. for her services to dance
Cyd died Tuesday at Cedars-Sinai Medical Center after suffering an apparent heart attack on Monday, June 16, 2008.
Museum Of Talking Boards
"Ouija knows all the answers. Weird and mysterious. Surpasses, in its unique results, mind reading, clairvoyance and second sight. It furnishes never failing amusement and recreation for the entire family. As unexplainable as Hindu magic—more intense and absorbingly interesting than a mystery story. Ouija gives you entertainment you have never experienced. It draws the two people using it into close companionship and weaves about them a feeling of mysterious isolation. Unquestionably the most fascinating entertainment for modern people and modern life."
With these words, William Fuld (businessman, designer, toy maker, with no branch factories or offices) invites you, the American people, to enter the strange, twilight world of Ouija, the Wonderful Talking Board.
No other single, mass-produced item quite captures the imagination of the American public like the Ouija board. Is it just a toy as many claim, or is it a portal to the spirit realm where one may find the answers to life's many mysteries? Does the Ouija sometimes take on a life of its own? Is it an implement of enlightenment, or a doorway to disaster? Questions like these continue to intrigue after a hundred years and are what makes the Ouija board extraordinary and truly magical.
From 1890 to 1950 dozens of different manufacturers with names like Kennard, Fuld, Haskelite, and Lee, cranked out their unique versions of the Wonderful Talking Board. Some displayed fanciful images of pyramids, swamis, and strange, mystical places. Others were more akin to Halloween with pictures of black cats, witches, and devils. Some boards, cheaply made, were merely poor imitations of the more successful ones. Despite their popular appeal, most talking boards were used a couple of times, shelved, and eventually thrown away. This resulted in the tragic loss of a fascinating American art form. At the Museum of Talking Boards, we think that it's time we celebrated this forgotten art. So come along with us as we display the boards, give you a little history, and if we can't answer all of your questions, feel free to ask the Ouija.
Not Always Right
Restaurant | Northville, MI, USA
Me: “Thank you for calling ******, my name is Ken and how may I help you today?”
Customer: “Do you guys make custom deep dish pizza’s?”
Me: “If by ‘custom’ you mean like a chef’s choice, then yes, we do.”
Customer: “And how much is that?”
Me: “Well, a regular sized deep dish, with tax included, will come to $18.01. With that, you get a choice of three toppings.”
Customer: “Great, then gimme a pizza with half pepperoni, sausage, and mushrooms. On the other half I want roasted veggies, bacon, and spinach.
Me: “Okay sir, now I must warn you that your new total comes to $24.37 because you have six items total.”
Customer: “What? No, I have three items on each side. Therefore, I should be fine.”
Me: “Sir, I do apologize for the misunderstanding. While it is true that you have three items on each side, the items are on ONE whole pizza. So, we have to charge you for the three extra toppings.”
Customer: “Now listen here! One regular deep dish is equal to two individuals, correct?”
Me: “Yes, but–”
Customer: “HEY, Shut up for a second! Now, two individuals are equal to one regular. CORRECT?”
Me: “Yes sir, it is.”
Customer: “Now using this logic, I should get my pizza for the price of two individuals.”
Me: “Sir, as much as I would like to agree with you, I simply can’t–”
Customer: “Let me see your manager. It’s obvious I can’t reason with you.”
(My manager comes up to deal with the situation. I walk away from the scene to seat some guests, when I hear…)
Manager: “HEY, 3+3=6, YOU HAVE 6 TOPPINGS, SO YOU OWE $24.37! HAVE A NICE DAY!”
(The guy quietly paid for his food and walked out like someone just threatened his life!)
Are you afraid of your mail?
How To Nap
Oldest Computer Music unveiled
Citizens Upset Over Abandoned Graveyard, Hell it makes me upset!
Roller Coaster Maker
Army Of Dude
5th Severed Foot Found in Canada
Thursday, June 19, 2008
NEW YORK - Maybe he was trying to beat the heat. A Brooklyn restaurant cook is accused of stealing frozen lobster tails by stuffing them down his pants.
The Brooklyn district attorney's office said Tuesday that Raymundo Flores has been arraigned on misdemeanor charges of petit larceny and criminal possession of stolen property.
Co-workers called 911 on Sunday to report a crustacean caper at the walk-in freezer at Junior's Restaurant. Police say they found lobster tails that Flores allegedly had hidden in his pants and in bandages on his legs.
Flores, a Manhattan resident, has been freed without bail. He's due back in court on July 3.
The name of his attorney could not immediately be determined.
Dumb Laws,Stuppid Laws
We started Dumb Laws because we knew there were literally hundred of dumb, stupid, and ridiculous laws still on the books, and once we uncovered them, people would definitely be interested in seeing them.
We have done our best to maintain the accuracy of this database, however, we are not lawyers and do not have the time nor resources to explore the topic as thoroughly as we would like. If you have information that conflicts with ours, please let me know!
Not Always Right
Bookstore | Melbourne, Australia
Customer: “I’m looking for a book.”
Me: “Were you after a particular book?”
Me: “What was the title?”
Customer: “I can’t remember.”
Me: “Do you know who the author is?”
Me: “Do you remember what it’s about?”
Customer: “I saw it recently…”
Me: “Can you tell me anything at all about it?”
Customer: “It had a nondescript cover.”
(And I found it!)
Wednesday, June 18, 2008
Arrested.Com, Free Online Crime Portal. Arrest Records, Attorneys, Bail Bonds. Local, State, National results covering all areas of crime. Locate missing persons.
Listen to Police Scanners, News headlines, report crimes. Legal links and victims assistance programs. Private and anonymous. Your identity is protected.
Find out what to do if you get Arrested. View the latest Celebrity Mug Shots,
Arrested.Com delivers over 15 years of crime data, news, and crime events. "When you see a crime, go online, to Arrested.Com".
Major Dinosaur Find
"Real" Nico Bellic From GTA
This Just in!! Gay Men's Brains are Like Straight Womens!! Well DuH!
The Web Time Forgot
Trio Of Super Earths Found
The End OF Windows XP in 2 weeks
Top 10 Robot Friendly Movies
Why You Should Marry Dave
Who's Pushing Up Daisies Today?
Are You Fetish
Latex and Nylon
Born In Latex
Not Always Right
Zoo | Pittsburgh, PA, USA
(I was a volunteer at the zoo, and was walking around an exhibit room with a boa constrictor in my arms so people could pet her.)
Man: “Can we pet it? It’s not slimy, is it?”
Me: “No sir, not at all. She’s very sweet, go ahead.”
Man: *pets snake* “Wow, it’s really soft.” *reaches for my head* “Let’s see if its handler is, too…”
Me: “?!?” *dodges his hand*
(Thankfully, he left quickly!)
Tuesday, June 17, 2008
Guiness World Record For Tattooing
Man Changed Name To "In God We Trust"
Food Porn Daily
20 Most Bizarre Celeb Baby Names
A Very Weird Shoe Collection
Dead Bug Funeral Kit
Who Died Today?
Planet Of The Cunts